Thursday, January 7, 2010

Violet's Autism

Violet may never "recover" or communicate. I had to come to terms with this fact last night. That the life I had in mind for her may never exist.
She may be severely autistic forever- and never be able to communicate what she's feeling, thinking or wants and needs.
She may never become the stunt woman I thought she'd become or be able to function without any help.
It kinda hit me like a ton of bricks last night after seeing the neurologist earlier that day.
Dave and I were talking and it was a real eye opener for me.
Don't get me wrong I still have very high hopes for her, but I also needed to realize the reality of the situation.
My daughter might have tantrums everyday, scream her head off everyday, cry everyday, for the rest of her life. That COULD happen. The opposite could also happen- she could be a normal functioning person, who doesn't need any extra help to get through each day.
Either way I'm thankful to have her as my daughter. And although each day is so difficult and a struggle, I love her with all my heart and look forward to each laugh and smile of hers.
I'm also thankful to have my son, Levi. So that I can be assured even when my husband and I are not around for when Violet gets old, her brother will be there to help take care of her.

Just wanted to share what was on my mind.
Thanks for listening. Stay tuned for more.

1 comment:

  1. A wise friend told me, "Hope for the best and paln for the worst." It is mature that you are accepting of things you may not want to hear. While this can be difficult it also gives you knowledge which can help you think freely about possibilites and out of the box options.
    I pray that there is a way you will be able to understand what Violet is saying. She is definitley communicating with you and she knows what you are saying. She wants to be understood which is a challenge for you.
    If you can try some support groups with just parents like you. It is amazing how freeing and strenghting it is to be with people that understand you.