Halloween 2010 AND the apartment hunt continues

Hey everybody!
So sorry it's been almost a whole week, since I last wrote a blog entry.
Things have been nuts!!!
Halloween just passed- you all know it's one of my most favorite holidays ever!
I dislike trick or treating in my current building- because everyone is rich and snotty.
The most of the kids are complete brats!
And this year is OUR LAST Halloween here!! Wooohooooooo!
I decided to spend Halloween with my extended family in Brooklyn.
It was amazing!
 Like in the movies- and not the horror movies- the beautiful family ones!
It's very family oriented there. Everyone was so nice and welcoming.
I'm hoping this will be our new neighborhood- and hopefully soon!
Violet LOVED the neighborhood- she even picked a few flowers and held them for hours, just smiling and laughing to herself.
Levi was great! He was the happiest I've seen him in so long!
Everything was going great- until we went to the diner for dinner.
Violet is on antibiotics because she has a sinus/throat infection ( same as her daddy).
But the antibiotics always make her stomach SOOOOO sick.
Every single time- she cries in pain- I feel so bad- but I don't have a choice.
She has a very sensitive stomach- especially to medications.
So she was sobbing in the diner! And was throwing a tantrum int he restaurant.
Later on she had to poo and squatted under the diner table (don't worry it was in her diaper).
But I was so embarrassed- people must've thought we were crazy.
Plus we were all in costume! Kayla and I were dressed as Princess Leia and my kids were dressed as tigers!
SO Violet was a tiny tiger freaking out, while shitting under the table.
That's my life!!!
Most of the workers there were Mexican.
By the way- I've been to this diner THREE TIMES so far- the food is AMAZING!!!
I love this place! And everyone is so nice!
Violet finally calmed down and Lee, Violet and Kayla were with me in the car on the ride home- we didn't get home until 10 P.M.
They loved being in the car- it was very calming for them.
They both fell asleep leaning against each other. It was so sweet.
When we got home Levi woke up and didn't go back to sleep until after midnight!

The next morning I had to wake up at 6:30 a.m. to get ready to go to Brooklyn to go apartment hunting yet again.
We spent the entire day looking at places- we didn't get home until about 8 p.m!!!!
That's over 12 hours!!

Cute story-
We went back to the diner yesterday in Brooklyn- I thought they were gonna give me evil looks or something - because of the night before with my kids.
They were ALL looking at me- so I guess they recognized me.
After we ate (I ate EVERYTHING!!! It was so good! All the workers looked at me in amazement as I almost finished my plate and then ordered cake!) Yeah- I EAT! So sue me!
After we paid the check-
one worker came up to me- and asked  me if I was here the night before.
I immediately started to explain- "Yes, those are my kids, I'm so sorry...blah blah blah."
Then another worker came over (my waiter) and said "I wasn't here last night, I was off from work. But everyone said how nice you looked".
I blushed! I was truly SHOCKED!!!
He went on to say "Hey next time, can you bring pictures????"
Now I was really blushing!
The other workers asked if I could come in dressed like that again!!!
Do they realize that WAS A HALLOWEEN COSTUME??? Not a party dress??!

It's so funny! But they didn't complain about my kids- and to me- that's a very good sign!
And heck, if I get good service dressed as Princess Leia- then so be it ;)

We saw almost seven places yesterday- a few were nightmares!!! But two were amazing!!! So beautiful and big and full of sunshine!!!
I hope we get a place- and soon!!!
Pray for us PLEASE!!!

I can't wait to live there near my extended family. It'll be awesome!!!

Kisses Bitches!

*photo of both my kids dressed as tigers for Halloween

My apartment hunting saga of 2010 continues

We found an apartment, one we all like. Big enough and with lots of sunshine!
Totally different from our hellhole of apartment we have now.
No daylight- and the whole place is falling apart on us.
Our current shitty building's new handyman- told us he's never seen an apartment so neglected by a landlord before. And that our landlord is the worst he's ever come across- and that's saying a lot.
We filled out all the applications- and it looked like everything was going well.
Till I got a call today from the broker asking me about our old housing court case.
I explained everything. How my kids and I have been ill consistently for over a year now due to the amount of mold on our ceiling, and all the other problems with the apartment that the landlord never had any intention of actually FIXING. He just wanted to paint OVER IT!
I even got a call from a painter TODAY- telling me he heard from "management" that we need painting done and some cabinets fixed.
I said "uhhh- WHAT?! We are moving at the end of November!"
He replied "Does the management know about this?"
"Uh- YEAH- they DO!"
"oh okay, I'll talk to management."
I told him "Nothing will be done in this apartment till we're gone. You got it?!"
"ok."

Are you serious?! Some painting and cabinet work? Oh my gosh they have no clue- well actually they do know what needs to be done in this apartment but they are TOO CHEAP and such freaking bastards- that they'll do nothing and let it be the person's (who buys this hellhole) problem.
Such pricks!!!

I took Levi to a new sensory gym this morning.
Now I've told several people including therapists- that he FREAKS out with change. He'll have a total meltdown - even when I'm pushing the stroller and I stop at a red light.
But they all think I'm exaggerating.
Well NOT ANYMORE!
I took Lee to the gym- the minute we entered the lobby- he freaked out started screaming at the top of his lungs!
His new occupational therapist (o.t. for short) was so surprised at Levi's reaction.
He asked me if something happened? I replied- "Yeah- I came here!"
The rest of the session- over an hour including waiting time in the lobby- he screamed the entire time!!!
Me oh MY!
And yesterday his physical therapist was spinning him in her arms really fast- instead of making him excited- like it does Violet (she LOVES spinning)- Levi FELL ASLEEP!
We were both shocked!!! We have never even heard of a kid doing this!!
Could YOU falling asleep SPINNING?????!!!!
I doubt it.
I told my mom-"Levi takes Autism to a whole new level!"
We both cracked up- I have to deal with all these things with a really really good sense of humor- otherwise I'd be crying every single day.

On another note- yesterday Dave and I had a talk.
He didn't like the way he's portrayed in my blog.
The talk ended with me crying-
I do speak the truth in my blog- just so you know- I don't sugar coat myself- I've always said I'm an asshole.
Second- know that any blog, or book from one person's point of view is always skewed.
The way YOU look at the world is completely different from the way another person views the world- every person's view is a very skewed one.

I understand the frustration Dave feels.
I do see where he's coming from.
I do complain a lot and argue a lot.
I feel bad about this, most times.

All this said- I explained to him-
I don't think he knows how much I believe in him.
For the record-
He is brilliant. He is a way better writer than I will ever be. I'm a hack- I've told you this.
He has the biggest heart of anyone I've ever known.
He's my best friend.
I feel he needs help- because the person I KNOW is inside him- the person I love spending time with, sharing my thoughts with, the person I married- is being taken over by "something else".
Someone that is angry most of the time, is anti-social and wants to sleep all the time- much like the way he describes me when I was full blown manic (except for the sleeping all the time)- "like there was a demon who had taken over the person he loved."
That is the same way I feel about him now.
If I didn't feel that way- that the Dave I love and care about is still in there- I wouldn't be here. Still trying to "fix" us.
The hope that we can get rid of this demon- and let the wonderful, kind, caring, loving, funny, brilliant Dave I know and love come through- is what keeps me going.

Sometimes I see this Dave shine through- sometimes it's at 3 o'clock in the morning. We will be talking and laughing and all I'll want is for this moment to last forever, while knowing in the back of my mind it won't last much longer. That feeling makes me sad.
But I have hope that things will change.
I do believe people can change- and change for the better.
I did.
He believed in me all along, stayed with me through thick and thin, forgave me for so much.

I pray we will get this new apartment,
-we will be healthy and not sick all the time anymore
-we will have money
-we will be happy
 -that any "evil" presence that is here now with us now in this hellhole- keeping us down, will no longer be with us and we can finally shine and have a great life.

Kisses Bitches doesn't seem appropriate right now for this blog- so instead-

God Bless you and I wish you an abundance of health, wealth, happiness and love always.


Oh and I pray I'll WIN THE LOTTERY!

*photo of a sensory room (not the one Violet or Lee goes to) It's like a big gymnastics room- fully padded.
Violet's school has one gym like this and ANOTHER with different lights, toys, and sounds - it's the most awesome place I've ever been- EVER!