One of the very best days!!!!

This morning started like every other morning before it,
I was tired and half-awake, woken up by my son crying in his crib- right next to my bed.
After having breakfast I saw the perfect opportunity to cut Levi's hair.
I sat him in his highchair, and went to work.
He was SURPRISINGLY GREAT and quite calm during the whole process. I praised him the entire time!
Especially compared to the last time I cut his hair and he screamed bloody murder through the entire haircut.
Levi had ABA therapy at home, towards the end of the session, I got on facebook very quickly (like I always do- I am ADDICTED to facebook).
And saw my old friend was online, one I met way back when (around 2003-2004 to be exact). When I was in the hospital (one of the many times) for my eating disorders.
She was also bipolar- and we bonded right away.
She understood me, unlike anyone ever had.
She went off the grid for awhile, the whole time I thought she was dead.
Us, bipolars- we don't get a lot of "happy endings".
Mostly they end in tragedy, sad to say.
I thought the worst had happened, especially since we were SO much alike.
I was sad for many many years, and always thought of her.

Well  thanks to facebook and some faith- I found her!!!
We talked, for the first time in years, this morning.
I almost cried- because it was so emotional for me.
Just talking to her for almost an hour, she still understood me better than anyone.
I was SO happy to have found her.
I cried when telling my sister and Dave that I spoke to her and how much it affected me.
You know who you are- and if you are reading this- I love you with all my heart chickie. You freakin "get" me, ya know?!

After that I went with Levi to school for his second day.
I met other mothers there! Mothers with kids similar to mine!
We talked for almost TWO whole HOURS!
They understood the things I go through with my kids, and it was the first time ever- I really could relate to another mother, ever!
We even talked about "what's wrong with our husbands!"
I love that talk- wives really bond during this conversation.
And believe me, if or when my husband has a similar talk with his friends about their wives-
He could talk FOR HOURS- maybe even days with things that are wrong with me. Hello- I'm bipolar.
If you have a complaint about me- well...
Then GET IN LINE!
All their kids, went to the same school as Levi- at the same time!

I met all their kids, they were all SO beautiful and lovable.
On the ride home with Levi on the school bus- I thought about what a fantastic day today was. It was completely meant to be that I moved to Brooklyn.
I believe this now with everything I have.

On the ride home,
Levi fell asleep.
This is a photo from today- him sleeping with Kayla's Sonic hat (yup- I bought it for her for Christmas- and Lee borrowed it) over his eyes.

So far so good!!!

I feel blessed and very lucky.
Of course, that feeling might change later in the day- because I am bipolar after all. Emotions change from minute to minute, second to second.


Kisses Bitches!!!

You can find me on facebook, under The bipolar bible.
I'd love to hear from you!

Levi's first day of school!!!!

This photo was taken on the bus ride BACK from school.
His first day of school, to be exact.
He did great!
Except for the fact that an hour in (the two hour school day) he got really really sleepy. Ha-ha!!!
On the bus ride home, all the little kids (under age three) were passed out in their car seats- looking like parachuters that got stuck in a tree (just hanging there!).
You should be able to tell from my blog- that I NEVER ever quite fit in, anywhere I go.
Is this my fault- sometimes- other times, just circumstance really.
I went with Levi to school yesterday and will be everyday for awhile till I know he'll be okay.
I wore- acid wash ripped jeans, with bright green men's socks, bright orange lipstick with matching nail polish, stripped black loose shirt, with fake motorcycle jacket- and to complete the look- an R2D2 backpack.
Why? Cuz that's the way I roll, bitch! That's the way I roll.
So of course everyone looks at me like I'm a fucking alien at the school.
I felt like an alien at the school- because I ALWAYS feel like I'm from a completely different planet than every normal person on earth.
It's not me thinking- they are weird- I think I'M weird.
And maybe I'm being extra critical of myself lately- but I feel I look SO strange.
Just weird- not beautiful at all- and really if you know me- this is not me fishing for compliments- and if you write one trying to make me feel better- I might just have to kill you. Just maybe.
I guess I go through these times where I just feel so out of place in the world- the way I look, the way I talk, the way I think- just everything about me.
Maybe it's cause I'm bipolar- or because I just have a very weird relationship with my self; my body, my emotions.

Plus on top of everything, my hair is starting to fall out again- it's around the eight month mark- so now I'm just waiting.
No one knows why exactly this happens to me pretty much every single year- at all different times of the year, and not just a little bit- but nearly all of it.
Could be my thyroid, who knows.
I now have a fedora hat that I ONLY wear when I'm bald for the reason that it never fits when I have a head full of hair.
So if everyone in my neighborhood, and everywhere I go basically, is looking at me like I'm an alien now- JUST WAIT till I'm bald again. Just wait.

Oh boy- so much fun.

Levi goes to school again today- and will be 5 days a week at the same school until he turns three years old.
His first day went very well-
hopefully today goes even better!!!

Kisses Bitches!!!!

Violet's brand new school!!!

I'm am so proud of Violet!!!
I know for sure after being there the whole day with her today at the school that THIS is the BEST school for Violet.
I fell in love with every child there!!!Most of them have physical disabilities as well as learning disabilities.
They were the cutest, sweetest most lovable kids I've ever seen (other than my own of course)
The teachers there absolutely love all the children there and take fantastic care of them.
They asked me to come back for the rest of the week and more, if I'd like.
I felt honored.
I enjoyed playing with all the children and watching Violet play with her new friends.
I knew- in my heart- that this is the very best school for her!
It's a YAI school. YAI has the best therapists and they really make you feel like family.
We are going to their Halloween party October 28th!!!
I cannot wait!!!
Most of the building is YAI schools from ages 3- up to adulthood.
Violet was tired today and had a few cranky moments but overall- she had a fantastic day.
She even sat on the potty TWICE for 5 seconds at a time!!!
And tried two new foods!!!
She painted and colored with all the kids.
Two kids seem to really like her, a sweet little boy- who kept smiling and saying hi to me and a little beautiful girl (she's autistic and doesn't speak). But she gave me great eye contact!!!
As I clapped for her and sang songs with the class.
I was so happy there.
I was exhausted from not sleeping- and not really eating- because Violet wouldn't let me leave the room to go get myself some lunch- but overall the day was magical.
I think Violet is really happy there.
She passed out soon after we got home, so we had to miss sensory gym.
But I could tell she was happy. She even took off her shoes and socks there- she was THAT comfortable there.
She was princess of the class for a day!!
She even got a whole PAGE of stickers and on the ride home on the school bus she stuck the happy face stickers all over her car seat!
I came more with a bit of a migraine ( the beginning of one) because I hadn't eaten.
So I ate some, drank a big old jug of coffee and took a shower.
The pain is going away now- PHEW!
And I can't wait to go back to school tomorrow.
Violet's napping now and I think she's having good dreams about her new school.

Thank goodness this all worked out in the end.

Kisses Bitches!!! Be good to your kids!!

*photo of my daughter on the day of her "baby audition" for the her new school ;) She's too funny!